for some reason i'm mute

 26.6.07

I want to be witty & artful....

So - my first belly dance performance has come & gone...and it was FANTASTIC! What a rush. I completely love performing. We're dancing again this weekend @ another local event. I just rec'd a global email from my teacher re: forming a performance troupe and I REALLY want to be selected. I feel so drawn to the art of belly dance. It just feels natural, but it's a wonderful challenge to "nail" the moves.

What a crazy week it's been. I had a meltdown last week, and I've been building myself up again. I've been trying to focus my thoughts on perfection in all aspects of my life -- my body - my ART - my dance - my career - my Spirituality. I just don't want to have to WORK so hard at my career anymore. There is so much more I want to do w/ my life. My scrapbook business needs some work. I definitely have goals for myself. I wish myself endless energy & confidence to achieve ALL of my ambitions. I'm receiving ALL good things into my life.

Additionally, we're also focusing on starting a family. Another thing to think about, but it's not a stressor - it's a PLEASURE! I'm so excited to get pregnant! I think my life will DRAMATICALLY change for the better. Having a little one will be a challenge, but I desperately need a change.

It's funny that I don't write in here more often. I often observe fuuny things during the day that deserve to be blogged, but once I sit at the computer - I feel mute. I want to CHANGE that and channel my CREATIVITY and ENERGY!

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Memories of me

 17.6.07

More than week in the house now, and we're still sorting through boxes. I'm amazed how much stuff we've accumulated. I feel like my writing has seriously suffered over the past while. I really blame law school and being a lawyer. It has really sucked the joy, sunniness, & frivolity of my past life. Or maybe...I'm just getting older. But I find it hard to believe how my creativity can be so stunted. Words used to flow - create magic on the page. I long to have the succulent style that used to define me when I was fun & fabulous. I feel boring, sterile and predictable.

"What does love feel like? I imagine love to be simple, yest acutely complex; fluid, yet thick; supernatural, yet starkly real; spilling over, yet just enough. I want to be fully met on every level by my partner. I want to be sloppy & seep out the edges. I want to do backbends and headstands, and sing wildly. I want love to be too much. I want to be frightened and comforted by love. I want to believe and trust and dance." - April 12, 2000

As we put together my scrapbooking room tonight, I dreamed of the day when I can work from home with my own custom scrapbook design business - Scrapendipity. I can CREATE and CONTROL my life...

I want SARK. I want Sabrina Ward Harrison. I want to publish. I want to CREATE. I want to live a FULL life that is joyful & optimistic & bright.

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