for some reason i'm mute


I want to be witty & artful....

So - my first belly dance performance has come & gone...and it was FANTASTIC! What a rush. I completely love performing. We're dancing again this weekend @ another local event. I just rec'd a global email from my teacher re: forming a performance troupe and I REALLY want to be selected. I feel so drawn to the art of belly dance. It just feels natural, but it's a wonderful challenge to "nail" the moves.

What a crazy week it's been. I had a meltdown last week, and I've been building myself up again. I've been trying to focus my thoughts on perfection in all aspects of my life -- my body - my ART - my dance - my career - my Spirituality. I just don't want to have to WORK so hard at my career anymore. There is so much more I want to do w/ my life. My scrapbook business needs some work. I definitely have goals for myself. I wish myself endless energy & confidence to achieve ALL of my ambitions. I'm receiving ALL good things into my life.

Additionally, we're also focusing on starting a family. Another thing to think about, but it's not a stressor - it's a PLEASURE! I'm so excited to get pregnant! I think my life will DRAMATICALLY change for the better. Having a little one will be a challenge, but I desperately need a change.

It's funny that I don't write in here more often. I often observe fuuny things during the day that deserve to be blogged, but once I sit at the computer - I feel mute. I want to CHANGE that and channel my CREATIVITY and ENERGY!


Memories of me


More than week in the house now, and we're still sorting through boxes. I'm amazed how much stuff we've accumulated. I feel like my writing has seriously suffered over the past while. I really blame law school and being a lawyer. It has really sucked the joy, sunniness, & frivolity of my past life. Or maybe...I'm just getting older. But I find it hard to believe how my creativity can be so stunted. Words used to flow - create magic on the page. I long to have the succulent style that used to define me when I was fun & fabulous. I feel boring, sterile and predictable.

"What does love feel like? I imagine love to be simple, yest acutely complex; fluid, yet thick; supernatural, yet starkly real; spilling over, yet just enough. I want to be fully met on every level by my partner. I want to be sloppy & seep out the edges. I want to do backbends and headstands, and sing wildly. I want love to be too much. I want to be frightened and comforted by love. I want to believe and trust and dance." - April 12, 2000

As we put together my scrapbooking room tonight, I dreamed of the day when I can work from home with my own custom scrapbook design business - Scrapendipity. I can CREATE and CONTROL my life...

I want SARK. I want Sabrina Ward Harrison. I want to publish. I want to CREATE. I want to live a FULL life that is joyful & optimistic & bright.

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